When I was little, my brother and I would sometimes go and stay with our uncle for a weekend. Our parents were very lax (the only thing my mum was very strict about was no smoking), but our uncle was on a different level: when we stayed with him, we’d watch multiple films back-to-back (he introduced us to 80s classics, including Rocky and the Terminator) and roast souvlaki on his fireplace (he lit the fire by igniting a trail of spirit starting on his living room floor. I can’t stress how cool this is to a seven year old); he’d take us on dirt trails on his motocross bike; and he took us for a ride in an old Land Rover our grandfather owned, which he drove onto the beach and into the sea, just for fun. (The engine gave out, so he had to call our dad to tow us out of the beach.) We had a grand old time.
I narrated all this to my kids, and while discussing it, my wife unexpectedly suggested we do a ‘no rules day’. We did not go full-on purge: we drafted a reasonable agreement, according to which the children would not be allowed to hurt anyone, break anything, contravene actual laws, or risk serious harm to themselves:
So how did it go? Was it bedlam? Was it hell-on-earth? Would I recommend that other parents do the same? In fact, it was rather anti-climactic, and the reason I’m bothering to write about it is to avoid publication bias. So here’s how it went down.
The first way in which my son took advantage of the day was by pouring an overly generous dose of maple syrup on his breakfast cereal: generous, but not absurd. It’s not like his Shreddies were swimming in it. My daughter followed Warren Buffet’s example and had ice cream for breakfast:
They spent the morning watching old-time cartoons, then Frozen, while having more ice creams, but they did eventually grow tired of starring at a screen, and asked to go outside. My daughter invoked ‘no rules’ to go outside in a nightdress, batman socks, and sandals, sartorial choices that I would have absolutely not countenanced under regular circumstances. And yes, she did also take another ice cream with her.
My son also used the ‘reasonable request’ clause to ask my wife to make a superman logo that he can pin onto his shirt. This my wife executed flawlessly:
Back home, the kids asked to take over cooking: I had told them before that next time we make carbonara (their favourite dish) they can assume the role of head chef, with my serving as their sous-chef. They did really well — I only had to question their instructions when they asked me to break four eggs to make the sauce. I did raise my eyebrows at my son’s suggestion to add broccoli to the recipe, a bold notion that will cause veri Italians to have a fit, but I did not overrule it.
Post-lunch, the kids asked to playfight, and after they gave me a solid beating, they asked to watch Lilo & Stitch. Then they asked to go out again. My daughter invoked ‘no rules’ to go out on her balance bike, which we’ve not let her do since she learnt to ride a real bike. We stayed out a long time.
After that, we went home, where the kids (very sensibly!) asked for a bath (less sensibly, my son took a roll of sweets with him into the bath, and dropped it inside the water. He ate them nevertheless). My wife made pizza (a dinner the kids had requested in advance), which we ate watching the new Walking with Dinosaurs. My wife, daughter, and I spent some time drawing, while my son copied out dinosaur facts from an encyclopaedia to his explorer notebook. It was 8:30pm by this time, and since drawing together before bed has become our routine, I thought they were getting ready to settle down, but no: my daughter said she wanted to watch Lilo & Stitch 2, and since it’s still the 25th, I have to acquiesce. So they’re now watching that while I’m typing this.
Their last request was to sleep in our bed. My daughter attempted one final salvo, asking for more time to draw, but after two minutes she finally realised she had completely run out of steam. So she came back to bed, and within four minutes, they were both sound asleep.
So, overall, the day did not differ all that much from a standard lazy Sunday at home; there was just much more screen time, and many, many more ice creams.
Final tally:
Ice creams: 7 (my daughter), 5 (my son)
Films watched: Frozen, cartoons, Lilo and Stitch, Walking with Dinosaurs, Lilo & Stitch 2
Edifying activities: drawing, cooking, playing outside, writing (son only)
Tantrums: 0
We’ll probably make this an annual event.